Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Observations about getting older ...

Over the last few months my ability to get out and about has been hindered physically and mentally.  Physically I am still not driving, the thought of driving actually scares the living daylights out of me and mentally the thought of going to a shopping centre and being around people is just overwhelming.  
As a result of this my hair has clearly undergone a fairly radical colour change!  I must confess I have always been a fairly regular hair colourer so it would be hard for me to know how long the glitter has been appearing in my hair.  And if in fact previously it was glitter or white or greying to white hair.  I think too be totally honest I have just kept the colouring up to date to the point where it just was a non issue.  But now as this photo shows I can no longer avoid it I have glitter streaks.  Of course I could call these grey but grey is dreary and dull and glitter sounds pretty and sparkly so glitter it will be. 

My eyebrows are another matter all together.  My eyebrows have been changing colour for as long as I can remember.  The hard part is that having blonde flecks throughout my hair naturally I was never really sure if in fact my eyebrows were just growing through more blonde hairs.  Of course on closer inspection it is clear that these are actually white!  When you think about that it is a little confusing why is it that my eyebrows are going white which I wouldn't in fact mind too much if it was the colour my hair on my head was going but it is just going a dreary, dull grey.  
Now comes the kicker - as a woman we typically accept that as we get older the weight gets harder to shift, our hair changes colour, we get wrinkles and the list goes on.  Of course these really are mostly superficial changes but they affect how we feel about ourselves.  I remember when I was working in Aged Care and showering residents was one of my duties it was hard not to notice that not only do some folks go bald up top but also down below.  
So our hair colour changes to sometimes a beautiful glittering white but most often a coarse dull grey colour, some of us loose their hair & and the rate at which it grows slows significantly, this doesn't seem to be the case for me though.  Some go bald in the pubic area which is kind of funny when you think about the money women spend on waxing or laser to remove pubic hair wait long enough and it will all fall out naturally! 
But in an even crueller twist of age and hormones we get NEW hair in places we just simply don't want it!  I am sure we all have memories of an older aunt or maybe granny we can remember who had whiskers or perhaps stubble that you could feel when given the obligatory kissed greeting.  I am certain that I was determined that I would NEVER EVER get hairs on my chin or a moustache!  I mean that wasn't something that I aspired to!  Guess what it turns out that regardless of how much you wish for something wishing doesn't make it so!  
This means that most days before washing my face and then mouisturising (to stop the wrinkles - if I can't stop the chin hair be damned if I am going to have a dried up prune wrinkle face!) I do a quick chin check!  This means I rub my fingers across my chin to see if I can feel any hard hairs sticking out and if I can out come the tweezers!  Of course being blonde I am fairly fortunate with my body hair in that mostly it is not overly noticeable but it is no less frustrating.  
Now the bigger question of all is do I bite the bullet and accept that my hair is glittery or do I work out a way to get some colour to cover it?  I know that if it was going to go beautifully white I would just let that happen gracefully but grey I am just not sure I can.  Would you? 

Cathy xoxo

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

De-lurking time

I was inspired to write this by a writer that I love Mrs Woog.
Most of you know who I am but just in case just briefly; I am Cathy, wife to a great man who supports me in all my craziness.  I am also Mum to three gorgeous kids, one son and twin girls (and yes I get them mixed up all the time!)  These four people are the light of my life, we also have two furbabies Chewy & Obi - I'm reliably told after Chewbacca & Obi Wan Kenobi.  We live south of Sydney in the Illawarra region.  In a former life I trained as a high school teacher but have worked in so many different jobs including Aged Care nursing, Sales & Marketing, Communications, Advertising, Project Management - you name it there is some likelihood I have had a little bit of experience in it (well all except manual labour type jobs!)  These days my fulltime job is recovery, recovery from a breakdown, getting my mental health back on a liveable even keel and being the best wife, mum & friend I can be.  
I like lots of sports netball, cricket, rugby league you name it I will probably watch it all except golf, billiards and lawn bowls, I used to play netball but those days are long behind me.  These days I ride my bike on a stationery trainer until I get my balance back which could be a while before I head out into the world on the bike.  
My favourite foods include milk chocolate, white chocolate, flavoured milk chocolate ummm nenish & pineapple tarts, and a good chai latte.  I love to bake and cook and I do these from the heart for the people I love. My favourite things to cook are homely meals full of nourishment and decadent goodness like butter, cream, you know all the things "they" say are bad for you.  I am pretty famous for my desserts, cakes and mushrooms (you know the yummy pastry ones.)  I know that I can still do these things it just takes me a lot longer to plan and organise and focus on these tasks at the moment.  I don't drink alcohol but do love a good mocktail.
In the before I would knit and crochet to wind down, I am still finding it hard to organise my thoughts to get these things done, the good news is my hand is mostly cooperating these days so once I can coordinate the brain with the hands I should be able to get back into these hobbies.  I have a huge stash of wool in my craft corner in my room so I obviously had lots of projects planned! 
I created mummyhaze mainly for me to write down some of the craziness in my head to try and clear some of the haze that was life with three small children.  It was sadly neglected but anyone with three young children can understand this I am sure.  These days mummyhaze has become the palce for me to write about my life in the now, the confusion that it is for me and as part of my recovery.  
Thank you for reading my ramblings about me and please I would love, love, love to hear a little about you, even if I know you from the before.  

Cathy xoxo